As the organizer of a small local club, eventually your group will get to the point where most people know each other. This will be the point at which new members might have a little trouble fitting in. This can be a little daunting for some folks and might even keep your club from growing.
So how do you make new members feel a part of the group? The most important thing you can do is to engage them. If you do nothing else, you must do this.
Let’s say you have a Ladies’ Night Out club and one of your members has a new neighbor she wants to bring her to the next event. “Great!” you say, the group could use some fresh faces. At the next event, however, the old group does what they always do: talk about their jobs, their kids, the new product they tried, the new blog they found. People prefer things (and people) they’re familiar with, so most people will naturally talk to the familiar faces and ignore strangers. They are not being rude, they are just being… well… people.
Your job, as the host, is to engage the new person.
Let’s say her name is Kim. This may be obvious, but Kim needs to be introduced right at the start. You might even ask her if she wants to tell the group a little about herself. Make sure you ask her if she’s OK with this prior to the start of the get-together. She might want to think of a few things to say in advance, or if she’s shy she might even decline. It also helps to have the person who brought Kim introduce her.
Then during the course of the event, gauge Kim’s level of involvement. If it seems low, there are a couple of tactics for helping her along.
- At the first opportunity (if you can find a break in the chatter), turn to Kim and loudly say “Kim, what do you think of that? Have you tried XYZ product?” This may take a couple of tries, since Kim is likely to be a little overwhelmed and feeling a little shy. This may be a little overly dramatic, but you get the drift.
- If you can’t get her to boldly engage with the group, try starting a side-conversation. As soon as Kim says something that you know might be a common thread with another member of the group, pull the other member in. “Hey Lucy, Kim says her son Matt is thinking of going to UVA next year – didn’t your daughter look at that school?” Or “Jill, did you hear that? Kim loves to cook Indian food. Kim, Jill went to India last year and loved it.”
What you are doing is simply finding connections for Kim within the group. It is not hard to do, and Kim will appreciate your efforts, and if she feels comfortable enough may even spread the word about how great your group is. And she will most likely attend the next night out.
The downside to not doing this is probably obvious. Kim will feel isolated and ignored, and wonder why she even came. She may even pull away from the friend who brought her. And she may even tell others about her experience.
So do yourself, and your group, a favor, and go the extra mile to help your new members feel welcome.
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